Spaces In Between

The tiny eyes. The innocent lips. That alluring face. That look. A cold, hard stare. Something that you'd want to walk away from. You walk away in apprehension. But the feel of the stare is still within you as you scurry away. You turn around after a distance and those eyes aren't there anymore. You scour the area desperately to seek, again, what you came for. But it is no longer there. No longer within your sight. You start to feel anxious. Your eyes zoom in and out and widen its scope. You start to squint. You see a faint image. A familiar image. The image you have been seeing for so long. You hasten your pace to walk towards that image. Your vision gets clearer with every step. Your footsteps start getting wider apart. You see that which you have chosen to avoid. Every time you inch towards those eyes, you fear. Fear yourself. Fear what you will do to yourself. Fear what you will do to those eyes. Fear what will become of you when those eyes scrutinize you. But each and every time you pluck up the courage to stand your ground, you tremble. You start to feel as if you're about to piss all over yourself but your ego takes over and stops that from happening.

You pause for a second to catch your breath. You try and correct your vision. You embrace yourself, somehow, for what is to become of you and those eyes. Then you realize something. You've been spotted. You start to look around, all fidgety. No one is there. Not anymore. But, but, just a matter of seconds ago, you were swarmed with people. So where did everyone go? You slap the back of your head hoping this is a dream that you'd wake up from. Nothing happens. Those eyes move towards you. You blink in despondency. You rub your eyes. Your body is hampered. Your vision is cloudy. Your mind is shackled. Your close your eyes and hope it will all go away. You feel sweat all over your body. You feel those eyes looking straight at you from close proximity. So close, you can hear the breathing down your neck. You feel your lips brushed by another. It was the same feeling but something was foreign about it this time. You bother about it not and enjoy what you think is your lucky break.

Suddenly you feel nothing. Not being stared at. No one breathing down your neck. No lips brushing by. Silence. For five whole seconds. Then the noise is overwhelming. Traffic is heavier than usual. You're wet. From the heavy downpour that has been there all this while. You didn't feel it till now. You slowly open your eyes. You see a pair of eyes staring at you in amusement. You'd swear you've seen these eyes before. A smile appears on that face. You feel comforted that this person knows you but you fail to make sense of who that is. You look around, hoping to see those eyes. Nothing. The environment, ambiance, atmosphere and circumstance all seem completely different to you now. Irrelevant perhaps. You can hear the background noise but what these eyes tell you fall on deaf eyes. You try to clear your head. It works.

You and those eyes, both naked on the bed. Conjoined and making love. You smile to yourself. You start to feel the raindrops no more. You're home. Sheltered by love. By the familiar eyes. By the god sent umbrella. You're shoved aside to start walking. You look down onto the floor. Watching each drop of rain splattering on itself. You visualize the love making session in your head and start to feel warm. The warmth that these familiar eyes is showing on you. You fail to differentiate the reality from what is running on your mind. You know you've arrived at a room. Drenched. Despondent. Drugged. The umbrella is set aside. Buttons on your shirt come off, one at a time. Your jeans come off too. You're draped in a towel. Off comes your boxers. Your hair gets dried. You've been seated on the bed. Your body is getting dry. You start to visualize further. You feel the same warmth, down under. You chuckle. You moan. You fall asleep.

The hours have past. Your eyes open, slowly. You see the familiar eyes naked and getting dressed. Before you can wonder if you've just fucked your good friend, you wake up in a shock. You've been left stranded. In a cold, dark alley. Naked. No clothes, no money. Then you start to clear up. You feel the same warmth. You wake up. For real. It's a bright, sunny day. Those eyes that you've come looking for will never be seen anymore. That was the past that still haunts you every night. Every night before you hesitantly made love to these eyes. It became a routine. Something that you're still struggling to cope with. Just like every day, you're relieved that it is over, for now, for today.

You turn to other side of the bed. The familiar eyes smile at you again. You smile in return. You know you're home and safe with the one you love. You've left no spaces in between.

Tags: life, personal thoughts, provoking thoughts